Supercomputer predicts Premier League table 22/23 – with hilariously bizarre results

A supercomputer has baffled football fans with some outlandish predictions for the final 2022/23 Premier League table.

The prediction, from Football Web Pages, has an unlikely champion, a team that scores 100 goals but doesn’t win the league, and a club conceding 100 times but avoiding relegation.

Most curiously, the supercomputer predicts eight teams to go unbeaten at home, plus eight teams to not get a win away. The truly baffling simulation makes for fascinating reading, so let’s get into it.

Supercomputer makes Premier League predictions: The top four

Good news for Gunners fans; the supercomputer tips Arsenal to take the 2022/23 Premier League title, with 86 points. This is in part thanks to an unbeaten home record – although they do not go “Invincible” again, losing six times away from The Emirates.

Manchester City will finish second, per predictions, three points off Mikel Arteta’s side. This is despite City scoring 104 goals, and winning every single home game. They are one of two teams to have a perfect home record, as Spurs (predicted fourth) also go 19-0 at their ground.

With this, City and Spurs would make history as the first teams to win every match at home.

Completing the top four in this prediction is an unlikely team. Thanks to another unbeaten home record, and a league-lowest 16 goals conceded, Brighton take third place and UCL football. Amazingly, the supercomputer slates the Seagulls to finish on the same points as Man City, despite scoring 55 fewer goals.

Middle of the pack

Liverpool, Chelsea, Leeds, and Newcastle will all go unbeaten at home, per predictions. However, Jurgen Klopp’s men will miraculously fail to win a single away trip in 2022/23 – yet still finish fifth. Considering that they have not won away from Anfield yet this season, that seems to be the logic to this estimate.

Similarly, Chelsea pick up just one win all season on their travels. They will apparently slump to a tenth-place finish.

Meanwhile, Brentford pip Man United to sixth place and the final Europa League spot. The London side finish with a far superior goal difference than the Red Devils, scoring 77 times. This means that the supercomputer thinks that Brentford will get more goals than eventual champs Arsenal.

The odd predictions continue as we move down the table.

Relegation zone

Firstly, the supercomputer predicts West Ham to finish bottom and exit the Premier League. This would be the Hammers’ first relegation since the 2010/11 season. Incredibly, predictions indicate that David Moyes’ side will win just one game all year – matching Derby for fewest in a single campaign.

Joining them is Leicester City in 19th, per the computer. They will allow an astonishing 110 goals in 2022/23, obliterating the record for most conceded in a season. In reality, their defence is leaky – conceding 22 times already this season. But it can’t reach that level, surely?

Finally, the supercomputer slates Nottingham Forest as the third team to go down in 2022/23. They, like Leicester and a number of other teams, fail to register a win away from their own digs.

Amazingly, Bournemouth avoid the drop by two points despite letting in 100 goals. The recently promoted side also only score 14 times.

(Lack of) goals

Speaking of goals, the computer has predicted that very few Premier League sides will be in thrilling matches. For instance, Wolves (16th) will only score nine all season, conceding 23. Everton, who finish one place above them are not much better: 11 for, 25 against.

Both sides would beat the current fewest goals record,  which Derby and Sheffield United hold. These teams only scored 20 times. Derby achieved this in 2007/08, meanwhile, the Blades netted goals this infrequently in 2020/21.

But bottom club West Ham would beat them all. They will find the net just five times, but will only concede 36. If this came even close to happening, the Hammers would then possess a number of unenviable records. It may cheer up Derby fans, though, as their 2007/08 team would no longer hold them.

Overall, this confusing, surreal prediction would make for the most remarkable Premier League season ever seen. But it is, surely, exceptionally unlikely for much of this to materialise.

The full finishing spots

  • 1. Arsenal
  • 2. Manchester City
  • 3. Brighton and Hove Albion
  • 4. Tottenham Hotspur
  • 5. Liverpool
  • 6. Brentford
  • 7. Manchester United
  • 8. Leeds United
  • 9. Fulham
  • 10. Chelsea
  • 11. Newcastle United
  • 12. Crystal Palace
  • 13. Aston Villa
  • 14. Southampton
  • 15. Everton
  • 16. Wolverhampton Wanderers
  • 17. Bournemouth
  • 18. Nottingham Forest
  • 19. Leicester City
  • 20. West Ham United

Featured Image Credit: Getty